Hey liberals...

My name is Karl and I hate every single one of you. All of you are exploitative, greedy, parasites who spend every second of their day looking at stupid ass stock reports. You are everything bad in the world. Honestly, have any of you ever organized a union? I mean, I guess it's fun making fun of people because of your own selfishness, but you all take it to a whole new level. This is even worse than speculating on tulips.

Don't be a stranger. Just hit me with your best theory. I'm pretty much perfect. I wrote a book about the faults of capitalism. What books do you write, other than "a few people should own everything because they're special" I also wrote pamphlets, and have a really great benefactor (He just sent me $5, shit was so cash). You are all vampires who should just lose their wealth. Thanks for listening.