Same here, I have an old Thinkpad running Windows just for my car tuning software, last thing you want is a potentially unstable connection when flashing an ECM.

47 x 100 as I recall from my days working in a Builders Merchant, still referred to as 'four by two' by builders though

Laughs in i3

Sets VPN to Ireland

It eats the wild haggis that stumble and fall into the Loch

Infemmy! Infemmy! They've all got it in for me!

With apologies to Kenneth Williams

Burn the house down and claim on the insurance

Yeah, I might go and live in mainland Europe ... Oh, hang on ...

Ask them if they've ever watched Casino and smile

Governments selling shares in nationalised industries to the public ...

Piss off

At least they'll be too busy talking about themselves to eat you, not that they'll be hungry anyway.

40 days and 40 nights in the desert with no food and you reckon Jesus didn't rub one out to lift his mood, yeah, OK

England here, we invented this shit, sit down

Breaking wind when I cough

Dynoed at 247 bhp

Space Karen wins again

Space Karen wins again

Translation, "I've been pissing about with the code again and now it's broken"

Same, it's a bit sad, but I've not used it for weeks and I'm certainly not going to start paying