'White male in his 50s or 60s' cited for killing geese in Springfield, Ohio — not Haitians
  • Zoift Zoift Now 100%

    I would never disrespect the noble goose by using a shotgun. Or a lawn mower. This is hand-to-bony-wing-protrusion combat.

    And he just threw them away? Didnt even eat the hearts to gain their impishness, or take the eggs to raise as his own. No warriors spirit.

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  • Well there's your problem.
  • Zoift Zoift Now 100%

    It may not be power efficient, but that water is definitely heated.

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  • :gently-escort:
  • Zoift Zoift Now 100%

    Fund around and find out.

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  • :gently-escort:
  • Zoift Zoift Now 100%

    You have to get -100000 in debt, which requires either active effort, or being a really dumb & persistant kid.

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  • emoji
    emoji Zoift Now 100%
    :gently-escort:

    Piggybacking on [@Dirt_Owl@hexbear.net](https://hexbear.net/u/Dirt_Owl)'s post. If we're doing OG Simcity emojis, the Game Over screen goes hard.

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    Help! My son is a friend to the creatures of the forest, and they are turning him against me
  • Zoift Zoift Now 100%

    You gotta attack from two angles here. For the wildlife, you can spread scent-based deterrants around like linseed or cotton oil, or a salt circle, or a bunch of piss. Try to puff yourself up really large and make as much noise as you can while cursing the local spirits and gods in dire hubris that you claim this land as your own. Get good at animal calls and beatbox that shit back to them louder. Just really mog the shit outta the genius loci and make any fae feel like the property values are falling.

    For your son, sit down and talk to them about the dangers of rabies and beastwiles. Consider getting them individual therapy and a piece of cold-wrought iron to carry around. Make sure they know how to reliably and safely operate a gun, and understand the basics of electroplating.

    5
  • Did Marx wear a cock cage?
  • Zoift Zoift Now 100%

    He wanted to, but it irritated his pp carbuncles.

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  • Thinking about chelating
  • Zoift Zoift Now 100%

    The Chadate and The Virgin Zinc, rejecting the hoesphates

    This is yoai

    3
  • What are some lingering Redditisms, or generally annoying internet conversation trends, that you wish would end already?
  • Zoift Zoift Now 100%

    A reference to something is not a joke. Monty Python et al isn't funny outside of context.

    26
  • Marx failed to consider why they call it oven when you of in the cold food of out hot eat the food
  • Zoift Zoift Now 100%

    Why are ovens called ranges when they only cook food point-blank?

    3
  • Lol lmao
  • Zoift Zoift Now 100%

    Terminator vision sweeps across the room.

    Analysis: Area Rug: Chinese(99%), TV: Chinese(83%), Cargo Shorts: Indonesian(chinese?)(92%), Male intestine(large) Angloid(88%+/- 20% Chinese)

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  • Butt idea: Have a butt idea instead of a bit idea
  • Zoift Zoift Now 100%

    What if instead of having butt ideas, we had ideal butts?

    6
  • You've heard of Super Mario Sunshine, now get ready for...
  • Zoift Zoift Now 100%

    Is this some sort of distilled mushroom hooch, or just Wario's fat ass?

    7
  • i fucked you're mom AMA
  • Zoift Zoift Now 100%

    I'm mom? Hell yeah. Gonna name this kid like a stray cat. Maybe either Stromboli or Cat Benetar.

    4
  • Illegal. Too fun.

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    youtu.be

    I seriously cannot tell if i'm enjoying this. Someone else needs to be subjected to this. Should railroad this through as a movienight interstitial.

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    https://live.hexbear.net/c/movies

    ~~Cytube is being naughty, rerouting to the old cytube until it starts playing the files i give it.~~ Cytube lives? If it shits the bed again, backup [Here](https://cytu.be/r/hexbear) ________________________________________________ Collateral(2004) - Its like "Phonebooth"(2002) meets "The Transporter"(2002), also I havent seen it, but its clearly that. CWs- Violence, mild woogin' [IMDB Guide](https://m.imdb.com/title/tt0369339/parentalguide) [DoestheDogDie?](https://www.doesthedogdie.com/media/9199) _________________________________________________ The Northman(2022) - Shameless Game of Thrones cash-in, smdh CWs- Violence, Animal abuse, SA, Drug use, Child abuse, Its a viking movie, Chuds probably love this [IMDB Guide](https://m.imdb.com/title/tt11138512/parentalguide) [DoestheDogDie](https://www.doesthedogdie.com/media/559747) ________________________________________________ BONUS! Bonnie and Clyde(1967) - Relationship goalz CWs - Violence, Woogin', So many cops die 070707 [IMDB Guide](https://m.imdb.com/title/tt0061418/parentalguide) [DoestheDogDie?](https://www.doesthedogdie.com/media/58076) _______________________________________________ Probably getting off work late tonight, may have to ask one of the cytube crew to queue it up. Links- [Collateral](https://www.mediafire.com/file_premium/i9hwx7d4putzwzv/Collaminated.mp4/file) [The Northman](https://www.mediafire.com/file_premium/s2zez0gtbjp7lxi/Yanquis.mp4/file) [BonnieandClyde](https://www.mediafire.com/file_premium/5oloabx9voqk3du/CrimeCoupleGoals.mp4/file)

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    https://live.hexbear.net/c/movies

    Ooooweeee we got some crime dramas tonight! _________________________________________________ The Sting(1973) - It's like the Godfather with more slapstick humor & ragtime music. CWs- Violence, Woogin, racial slurs [IMDB Guide](https://m.imdb.com/title/tt0070735/parentalguide) [DoestheDogDie?](https://www.doesthedogdie.com/media/98124) ________________________________________________ Rope(1948) - Cluedo, the movie! CWs- Mild violence, alcoholism [IMDB Guide](https://m.imdb.com/title/tt0040746/parentalguide) [DoestheDogDie?](https://www.doesthedogdie.com/media/17456) _________________________________________________ Also, in bad news, my work schedule is changing. I'm working every Friday now through the showtimes. Things have been stacking up in my personal life for a minute & I'm worried I wont be able to give the movie nights the attention they need. I'm going to try to finish out September, but offically looking for volunteers. Will pester the rest of the cytube crew about it later tonight.

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    https://live.hexbear.net/c/movies

    Django(1966)(Not the Tarentino one) - Cowboys kill Klanners. CWs- Violence, Torture, Wooging, Looting, Tooting, Cowboy Shooting [IMDB Guide](https://m.imdb.com/title/tt0060315/parentalguide) [Does the Dog Die?](https://www.doesthedogdie.com/media/30824) ______________________________________________ Akira(1988) - OG movie night movie; Boy fights esper manbabies, the illuminati, and cumbears. CWs- Violence, Gore, SA, Body Horror, a dog does in-fact die [IMDB Guide](https://m.imdb.com/title/tt0094625/parentalguide) [Does the Dog Die](https://www.doesthedogdie.com/media/8617) ______________________________________________ Happy Together(1997) - ![boykisser](https://hexbear.net/pictrs/image/682fa4e9-80fb-41c9-871a-d0b48e05a679.png "emoji boykisser") CWs- Seggs, Woogin, Dead animals [IMDB Guide](https://m.imdb.com/title/tt0118845/parentalguide) [Does the Dog Die?](https://www.doesthedogdie.com/media/115852) ______________________________________________ Having a bit of trouble sourcing everything this month. If you feel like volunteering sourcing or coverting video codecs, DM me. Otherwise I mayyyyyy end up doing the Tremors septology.

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    https://live.hexbear.net/c/movies

    Morning everyone. Posting this way early. Will ping closer to showtime. ________________________________________________ Breaking Bad(2010): Season 3, Episode 12 - We're not supposed to do this anymore. Breaking Bad(2010): Season 3, Episode 13 - William H. Pitsenbarger Jr. gets owned by the Viet Cong so hard they give him a medal over it to feel better. CWs- Violence, Sex work, Drug use, Waltah [IMDB Guides 1](https://m.imdb.com/title/tt1615552/parentalguide) & [2](https://m.imdb.com/title/tt1615553/parentalguide) _________________________________________________ Godzilla(1954) - Kaiju Night again. Been awhile. CWs- Camp violence, Lizard [IMDB Guide](https://m.imdb.com/title/tt0047034/parentalguide) [DoestheDogDie](https://www.doesthedogdie.com/media/9772) _________________________________________________ See you there. Love you all.

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    She is beautiful and i love her.

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    https://live.hexbear.net/c/movies

    MOVIE time again. How is this year passing so fast? This is bullshit, i barely wasted this year at all. Anyways... _________________________________________________ Voting open for the 1st, 8th, 15th, 22nd, & 29th. Taking top voted nominates (depending on piracy success) for two movies each Friday. Maybe a third if it fits the theme or is really good/bad. Pre-hosted nominations get extra weight becuase its less work. Dubs preferred over subs because Cytube is indignent about playing subtitle files without heavy cajoling. If it’s currently in theaters or on a streaming service its usually an pain in the ass to find a good torrent in time, but ill look for it anyways because fuck copyright. Shout out to the Cytube crew, our many haters & losers, and to viewers like YOU.

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    cross-posted from: https://hexbear.net/post/431481 > I recently inherited a chicken coop & small flock from a friend that had to give them up. They've got a big-ass yard to forage in with lots of grass, tree cover, and all the pumpkin plants they can destroy because i wasnt planning on having chickens when i planted them. Still learning birdcare, but half of them have learned to love headpets and are as fat & happy as I can keep them. > > However they've also attracted rat snakes & racer snakes to the coop. None of the snakes in my area are big enough to eat a full grown chicken, but it's stressing the chickens out and they keep trying to eat the eggs. > > I dont wanna hurt any of the snakes, they're adorable and dopey, but im grabbing a 4 foot frightened snake out of the coop everynight. I keep sealing up new gaps and they keep showing me new ones. Its getting kinda old & I'm starting to wonder if its a different snake every night or just a few really persistent lil guys. > > Is there a way to get them to fuck off? And how do biologists tag snakes? Is there like, a little thing i can clip into a scale or is it safe to hit them with a dab of paint or something? Cause if its just the same 2 dumbasses i keep greeting everynight i can just drive them to a nearby lake what i imagine snake heaven would be.

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    I recently inherited a chicken coop & small flock from a friend that had to give them up. They've got a big-ass yard to forage in with lots of grass, tree cover, and all the pumpkin plants they can destroy because i wasnt planning on having chickens when i planted them. Still learning birdcare, but half of them have learned to love headpets and are as fat & happy as I can keep them. However they've also attracted rat snakes & racer snakes to the coop. None of the snakes in my area are big enough to eat a full grown chicken, but it's stressing the chickens out and they keep trying to eat the eggs. I dont wanna hurt any of the snakes, they're adorable and dopey, but im grabbing a 4 foot frightened snake out of the coop everynight. I keep sealing up new gaps and they keep showing me new ones. Its getting kinda old & I'm starting to wonder if its a different snake every night or just a few really persistent lil guys. Is there a way to get them to fuck off? And how do biologists tag snakes? Is there like, a little thing i can clip into a scale or is it safe to hit them with a dab of paint or something? Cause if its just the same 2 dumbasses i keep greeting everynight i can just drive them to a nearby lake what i imagine snake heaven would be.

    32
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    https://live.hexbear.net/c/movies

    "The Craft"(1996) - Sandra Bullock and Nicole Kidman utilize their family heritage of dark magic to resurrect their terrible boyfriend, and must summon the perfect himbo to fight him. CWs- Violence, SA, child abuse, rascism, shitload of spiders & sneks [IMBD](https://imdb.com/title/tt0115963/parentalguide) [DoestheDogDie?](https://www.doesthedogdie.com/media/11669) _________________________________________________ "John Wick: Chapter 4" - It's "Shoot-em-up" but with dogs instead of people or something. IDK, I've never seen a John Wick movie. CWs- Violence, Animal Abuse, a director that probably thought "Wanted"(2008) was a good movie [IMDB Guide](https://imdb.com/title/tt10366206/parentalguide) [DoestheDogDie](https://www.doesthedogdie.com/media/22955) _________________________________________________ Next Nomination thread for September coming up this weekend, unless i get really busy and/or high. Thanks to our beautiful mods, the cytube crew, our Fed handlers, and Viewers like you! ![heart-sickle](https://www.hexbear.net/pictrs/image/14c2707b-51cb-44ed-be2f-f262d088e219.png "heart-sickle")

    22
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    Surely someone beat me to this

    84
    5

    No, Phallussy

    17
    5

    lmao tiddy birds

    37
    3
    https://live.hexbear.net/c/movies

    ![boykisser](https://hexbear.net/pictrs/image/682fa4e9-80fb-41c9-871a-d0b48e05a679.png "boykisser") We heard you like watching boys, dont you? ________________________________________________ Strawberry & Chocolate (1993) - Documentary on the discovery of Neopolitan Ice-Cream. CWs- Seggs, Suicidal ideations [IMDB Guide](https://m.imdb.com/title/tt0106966/parentalguide) [DoestheDogDie?](https://www.doesthedogdie.com/media/76377) _________________________________________________ Pumping Iron (1977) - This one is just porn. CWs- Drug use, Arnold Schwarzenegger says "Cum" [IMDB Guide](https://m.imdb.com/title/tt0076578/parentalguide) [DoestheDogDie?](https://www.doesthedogdie.com/media/237619) ________________________________________________ TRIPLE FEATURE CAUSE THIS MOVIE IS ALSO HIMBOTASTIC! Thr Barbarians(1987) - The 1980's cocaine abuse epidemic blessed us with this. CWs- Booba, Campy violence, animal abuse [IMDB Guide](https://m.imdb.com/title/tt0092615/parentalguide) [DoestheDogDie?](https://www.doesthedogdie.com/media/241538) ________________________________________________ Somebody crosspost this around the federation and tell them its Himbo night

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    https://live.hexbear.net/c/movies

    Cytube is operational again! Sorry for the outages. Also apologies to "Train to Busan" & "The Host", because i gotta find a prehosted versions or hardcode the subtitles, unless we wanna learn Korean. _____________________________________________ Outland(1981) - It's always high noon in solar orbit. Very 1980's. CWs - Violence, SA, Gore [IMDB Guide](https://m.imdb.com/title/tt0082869/parentalguide) _________________________________________________ Jennifer's Body(2009) - Demons keep being horny, and its a bad time. CWs- Violence, SA, Gore, Gratuitous woog [IMDB Guide](https://m.imdb.com/title/tt1131734/parentalguide) [DidtheDogDie?](https://www.doesthedogdie.com/media/10164) _________________________________________________ See yall tonight.

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    https://cytu.be/r/hexbear

    IT'S :vote: TIME. The Queue grows short. Voting open for the 4th, 11th, 18th, & 25th. Taking top voted nominates (depending on piracy success) for two movies each Friday. Maybe a third if it fits the theme or is really good/bad. Pre-hosted nominations get extra weight becuase its less work. Dubs preferred over subs because Cytube is indignent about playing subtitle files without heavy cajoling. If it’s currently in theaters or on a streaming service its usually an pain in the ass to find a good torrent in time, but ill look for it anyways because fuck copyright. Shout out to the Cytube crew, Posters of all shittiness, and to viewers like YOU. ________________________________________________ Server Borked. Firing up the old [Cytube](https://hexbear.net/post/281179?scrollToComments=false) until posting improves.

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    https://live.hexbear.net/c/movies

    Happy Friday yall. Its too goddamn hot. Lets watch movies and sweat on our popcorn for salt. ____________________________________________ Gung Ho(1986) - American workers once again fail to unionize and are kept in willful class ignorance. Feel good story for liberals everywhere. 🤗 CWs- Class traitors, Revisionism, Dudes Unrocking [IMDB Guide](https://m.imdb.com/title/tt0091159/) [DoestheDogDie?](https://www.doesthedogdie.com/media/23029) ________________________________________ Space Balls(1987) - Swackhammer (Danny DeVito), an evil alien theme park owner, needs a new attraction at Moron Mountain. When his gang, the Nerdlucks, heads to Earth to kidnap Bugs Bunny (Billy West) and the Looney Tunes, Bugs challenges them to a basketball game to determine their fate. The aliens agree, but they steal the powers of NBA basketball players, including Larry Bird (Larry Bird) and Charles Barkley (Charles Barkley) -- so Bugs gets some help from superstar Michael Jordan (Michael Jordan). CWs- Overplayed Mel Brooks to almost, but not quite, Monty Python level. Probably several jokes that didnt age well at all. [IMDB Guide](https://m.imdb.com/title/tt0094012/) [DoestheDogDie?](https://www.doesthedogdie.com/media/11340) _______________________________________________ Will send ping a bit closer to showtime.

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    Zoift Now
    36 460

    Zoift [he/him]

    Zoift@ hexbear.net